Caring for that One Little Candle

Posted by Papa Sez | Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Dear Mama Sez,

The day started not as well as it could have and after reflecting on what happened, I would like to let you know how important your light is to our family.

I like the metaphor of you being the light for two reasons: (1) it is a Filipino concept that the mother is the light of a home or "ang ina ang ilaw ng tahanan" and (2) just like a candle melting away to bring light so others might see, you have sacrificed so much to take care of your family to the extent of losing yourself in the process.

While it is true that parenthood entails self-sacrifice for the sake of the children, it is also our duty as parents to take care of ourselves to be able to provide for them their needs- not only in terms of material needs, but more importantly emotional support that can only be provided when we're available for them to touch and to talk to.

This is in line with the P/PC balance we discussed during our coaching sessions, which also coincided with what I just read a couple of hours ago about a dying person reminding his wife that it's okay to take care of herself. I say, it's imperative that you start with yourself before me and our children. It's the same logic as in the instructions given when we ride an airplane. Before take off, we're told that in cases of emergency, we're to put the oxygen mask (and life vest) on ourselves first before doing it for the child. Because the child is less capable of helping an adult. And even as adults, we cannot extend help or serve others if we ourselves need rescuing. Indeed, one is able to give if he/she has something to offer.

Candle light by Alesa Dam

As for being a little candle, we would like you to light our home the longest time possible. So please don't burnout on us. We need you to be here with us so please burn sustainably. By taking care of yourself, you are taking care of us in the long term. Better yet, by taking care of each other, we're taking care of our family sustainably... because remember, we need to last for as long as it takes to accomplish our individual and family missions.

So yes we're little candles. But since we are the most important little candles to our children, let us give light all the way to the finish line when our missions are completed- that would be the right time our children would see our last flickers, and then our dying light would no longer be of much consequence as by then we would have successfully passed on the torch to the next generation.

Loving you,
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Wanting and Doing

Posted by Papa Sez | Thursday, February 17, 2011

I know, I know, it's been ages since the last post and I've been terrible at keeping track of time. There's just so many things that I WANT DONE, and time is the one thing that we cannot keep, stop or extend, so I had to prioritize.

Actually, a decision has already been made a few months ago to consolidate our online writing efforts and most of you have been personally informed about that decision and to expect an invitation to move to Parenting Journey and follow us in Hubpages (as Mama Sez and Papa Sez) and Island Travel. The plan was to delete Daily Happiness Tips, WannaBeHappyNow, Daily Laughs, Happy Quotes Happy Images and Fatherhood Adventures. Late last year, our analysis points to the need to also focus on our strengths as professionals and so Insect Experts was launched.

But I am failing in some parts of the execution of that decision. It's really difficult to just delete what we've created (especially those that have also gathered some momentum and following). I am particularly attached to this blog as it was my very first attempt at online writing, so there's sentimental issues involved (naks!).

In this busy new year, Plan B has been cooked up to execute the decision to consolidate and focus. As it involves investments in time and money, it's been relegated to the back burner again.

Now, I should not promise when it's gonna happen but it must happen or we'll be constantly spread thinly without much success.

Therefore, my friends just hang on and bear with me for a little while longer. For the meantime, more blogging is happening in these sites:




By the way, you might have noticed the change in template of this blog. It's part of the baby steps towards consolidation and focus of our blogging efforts.

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